Action is no less necessary than thought to the instinctive tendencies of the human frame. ..................................

Monday, August 31, 2009

We've always done it that way!

This is absolutely crazy ... but a good read .. so read on ...

Does the statement, "We've always done it that way" ring any bells...?

The US standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches. That is an exceedingly odd number.

Why was that gauge used?
Because that is the way they built them in England, and English expatriates built the US Railroads.

Why did the English build them like that?
Because the first rail lines were built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that is the gauge they used.

Why did "they" use that gauge then?
Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons, which used that wheel spacing. Okay!

Why did the wagons have that particular odd wheel spacing?
Well, if they tried to use any other spacing, the wagon wheels would break on some of the old, long distance roads in England, because that's the spacing of the wheel ruts.

So who built those old rutted roads?
Imperial Rome built the first long distance roads in Europe (and England) for their legions. The roads have been used ever since.

And the ruts in the roads?
Roman war chariots formed the initial ruts, which everyone else had to match for fear of destroying their wagon wheels. Since the chariots were made for Imperial Rome, they were alike in the matter of wheel spacing. The United States standard railroad gauge of 4 feet, 8.5 inches is derived from the original specifications for an Imperial Roman war chariot.

And bureaucracies live forever. So the next time you are handed a spec and told we have always done it that way and wonder what horse's arse came up with that, you may be exactly right, because the Imperial Roman war chariots were made just wide enough to accommodate the back ends of two war horses.

Now the twist to the story....When you see a Space Shuttle sitting on its launch pad, there are two big booster rockets attached to the sides of the main fuel tank. These are solid rocket boosters, or SRBs. The SRBs are made by Thiokol at their factory in Utah.

The engineers who designed the SRBs would have preferred to make them a bit fatter, but the SRBs had to be shipped by train from the factory to the launch site.

The railroad line from the factory happens to run through a tunnel in the mountains. The SRBs had to fit through that tunnel. The tunnel is slightly wider than the railroad track, and the railroad track, as you now know, is about as wide as two horses' behinds.

Therefore, a major Space Shuttle design feature of what is arguably the world's most advanced transportation system was determined over two thousand years ago by the width of a Horse's arse.

And you thought being a horse's arse wasn't important??!!

Next time you ask why the client wants to some particularly weird bit of functionality and they say “we’ve always done it that way” remember this and think to yourself horses arse!!

:-)

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Work or Prison ? which is better? (Jfg ;-))


IN PRISON: You spend the majority of your time in an 8'X10' cell
AT WORK: You spend most of your time in a 6'X8' cubicle
IN PRISON: You get three meals a day (free)
AT WORK: You only get a break for one meal and probably have to pay for it yourself

IN PRISON: You get time off for good behavior
AT WORK: You get rewarded for good behavior with more WORK

IN PRISON: A guard locks and unlocks the doors for you ..
AT WORK: You must carry around a security card and unlock open all the doors yourself .

IN PRISON: You can watch TV and play games
AT WORK: You get fired for watching TV and playing games

IN PRISON: They allow your family and friends to visit
AT WORK: You can not even speak to your family and friends

IN PRISON: All expenses are paid by taxpayers with no work at all
AT WORK: You get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for the prisoners.

Humm?
Which Sounds Better?
So what are you waiting for......... ???
;-)

Monday, August 3, 2009

Lawyer

The staff at a local United Way office realized that it had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer.

The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute and said, "Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000, you give not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the community in some way?

"The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and replied,
"Firstly, did your research also show that my mother is dying after a long illness and has medical bills that are several times her annual income?"
Embarrassed, the United Way representative mumbled, "Um... No."

"Or," the lawyer continued, "that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair?"
The stricken United Way representative began to stammer out an apology but was interrupted when the lawyer added,

"Or that my sister's husband died in a traffic accident,"the lawyer's voice rising in indignation,
"leaving her penniless with three children?"
The humiliated United Way representative, completely beaten, said simply, "I had no idea...

" On a roll, the lawyer cut him off once again, "So if I don't give any money to them, why should I give any to you ?