Friday, December 3, 2010
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Saturday, November 6, 2010
Friday, August 20, 2010
He thought for a moment and said, put "getting older but you are getting better"
The salesman asked "how do you want me to put it?" The man said 'Well...put "You are getting older" at the top and "but you are getting better" at the bottom.'
When the cake was unveiled at the party all the guests were aghast at the message on the cake.
It read: "You are getting older at the top, but you are getting better at the bottom"
Moral of the Story:
1. Double proof read everything before you send.
2. Don't trust others to write it right for you.
3. Don't order cakes by telephone
You have a nice weekend ;)
Friday, July 16, 2010
When flood comes, fish eat ants & when flood recedes, ants eat fish. Only time matters. Just hold on, God gives opportunity to everyone!
Life is not about finding the right person, but creating the right relationship, it's not how we care in the beginning, but how much we care till ending.
Some people always throw stones in your path. It depends on you what you make with them. Wall or Bridge?
Remember you are the architect of your life.
Every problem has (n+1) solutions, where n is the number of solutions that you have tried and 1 is that you have not tried. That’s life.
`Search a beautiful heart, but don't search a beautiful face'. Coz beautiful things are not always good, but good things are always beautiful.
It’s not important to hold all the good cards in life. But it’s important how well you play with the cards which you hold.
Often when we lose all hope & think this is the end, God smiles from above and says, `relax dear its just a bend. Not the end. Have Faith and have a successful life.
When you feel sad, to cheer up just go to the mirror and say, `Damn I am really so cute` and you will overcome your sadness. But don’t make this a habit coz liars go to hell.
One of the basic differences between God and human is, God gives, gives and forgives. But human gets, gets, gets and forgets. Be thankful in life!
Only two types of persons are happy in this world. 1st is Mad and 2nd is Child. Be Mad to achieve what you desire and be a Child to enjoy what you have achieved!
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Friday, July 9, 2010
Friday, July 2, 2010
Friday, June 11, 2010
Thursday, June 10, 2010
They started an argument on whose Trainee engineer had more guts. The American PM called for one of his men and told him to jump off and take a round swimming around the moving ship.
The Trainee did as he was commanded. The American PM boasted of by saying, "See the guts!"
Now the German PM called out for one of his men and asked him to take two similar rounds around the moving ship.
The Trainee did as he was told. When he came back from the water the German PM said, "See the guts!"
Now the Indian PM called out for his most courageous man and asked him to take five similar rounds.
The Trainee promptly replied, "Why the hell should I ???"
The PM proudly said, "See the guts!"
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Please click on the pics to have a closer look
Wake Island, Pacific Ocean...
Tioman Island, Off the coast of Malaysia
Macao Intl Airport
A rock, off the coast of Green wood...
Outstanding job by a great young pilot from Pennsylvania!
(Canadian Military Labrador Helicopter)
Cant add anything else to this.....the next picture is worth 10000.. words..If you think your
military pilots don't earn their pay, you need to take a look at this picture.....
This photo was taken by a soldier in Afghanistan of a helicopter rescue mission.
The pilot is a PA National Guard guy who flies EMS choppers in civilian life.
Now how many people on the planet you reckon could set the ass end of a chopper down on the roof top of a
shack, on a steep mountain cliff, and hold it there while soldiers load wounded men in the rear.
If this does not impress you......I am sorry....nothing will ever will.....
(This is a forward mail)*
The Only Day In Your Life, You Cried And Your Mother Was Smiling........
Friday, May 28, 2010
A: Just forget it once and you will never forget it again
************ ********* ********* ********* *
Husband: Do you know the meaning of WIFE? It means, Without Information, Fighting Everytime!
Wife: No darling, it means, With Idiot For Ever
********** ********* ********* *********
Doctor: Your husband needs rest and peace. Here are some sleeping pills.
Wife: When must I give them to him?
Doctor: They are for you
************ ********* ********* ********* *
Wife: I wish I was a newspaper, So I'd be in your hands all day.
Husband: I too wish that you were a newspaper, So I could have a new one everyday.
************ ********* ********* ********* *
Wife: I had to marry you to find out how stupid you are.
Husband: You should have known it the minute I asked you to marry me.
************ ********* ********* ********* *
Husband: Today is Sunday & I have to enjoy it. So I bought 3 movie tickets.
Wife: Why Three?
Husband: For you and your parents
************ ********* ********* *********
Husband: What will you give me if I climb the great Mount Everest?
Wife: A lovely Push...!!!
Friday, May 21, 2010
An American visited India and went back to America where he met his Indian friend who asked him;
"How did u find my Country?"
The American said:
"It is a great country with solid ancient history and immensely rich with natural resources."
The Indian friend then asked "How did u find Indians??"
I didn't find or met a single Indian there in India.
Who else could u met in India then??
The American said..
In Kashmir I met a Kashmiri
In Punjab a Panjabi
In Bihar, Maharastra, Rajasthan, Bengal, Tamil Nadu, Kerala
Bihari, Marathi, Marwadi, Bengali, Tamilian, Malayali
Then i met
And many many many more but not a single Indian did i meet!
Well I don't know to which category this belongs. This is neither fun nor moral.
Anyway lets hope the new generation will think and act 'seamless', ignoring those nasty politicians who mislead the youth by injecting regional fanaticism.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
India vs Australia  match...
Brad Hogg took Sachin's wicket.
At the end of the match Hogg gave that
ball to Sachin for his autograph.
Sachin put his sign with one beautiful sentence,
"IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN." –
Till today Hogg could not take his wicket for the second time.
THAT'S CONFIDENCE & DEDICATION..!
HATS OFF TO OUR LITTLE MASTER SACHIN.
After this incident Brad Hogg and Sachin Tendulkar came face to face 21 times...but he could never get the Master Blaster out!
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others' affairs. We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic and those who do not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the right direction, our direction. This thinking denies the existence of individuality and consequently the existence of God. God has created each one of us in a unique way. No two human beings can think or act in exactly the same way. All men or women act the way they do because God within them prompts them that way. There is God to look after everything. Why are you bothered? Mind your own business and you will keep your peace.
2. Forgive And Forget.
This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We often develop ill feelings inside our heart for the person who insults us or harms us. We nurture grievances. This in turn results in loss of sleep, development of stomach ulcers, and high blood pressure. This insult or injury was done once, but nourishing of grievance goes on forever by constantly remembering it. Get over this bad habit. Believe in the justice of God and the doctrine of destiny. Let Him judge the act of the one who insulted you. Life is too short to waste in such trifles. Forgive, Forget, and march on. Love flourishes in giving and forgiving.
3. Do Not Crave For Recognition.
This world is full of selfish people. They seldom praise anybody without selfish motives. They may praise you today because you are in power, but no sooner than you are powerless, they will forget your achievement and will start finding faults in you. Why do you wish to kill yourself in striving for their recognition? Their recognition is not worth the aggravation. Do your duties ethically and sincerely and leave the rest to God.
4. Do Not Be Jealous.
We all have experienced how jealousy can disturb our peace of mind. You know that you work harder than your colleagues in the office, but sometimes they get promotions; you do not. You started a business several years ago, but you are not as successful as your neighbor whose business is only one year old. There are several examples like these in everyday life. Should you be jealous? No. Remember everybody's life is shaped by his/her destiny, which has now become his/her reality. If you are destined to be rich, nothing in the world can stop you. If you are not so destined, no one can help you either. Nothing will be gained by blaming others for your misfortune. Jealousy will not get you anywhere; it will only take away your peace of mind.
5. Change Yourself According To The Environment.
If you try to change the environment single-handedly, the chances are you will fail. Instead, change yourself to suit your environment. As you do this, even the environment, which has been unfriendly to you, will mysteriously change and seem congenial and harmonious.
6. Endure What Cannot Be Cured.
This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage. Every day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations, and accidents that are beyond our control. If we cannot control them or change them, we must learn to put up with these things. We must learn to endure them cheerfully thinking, "God wills it so, so be it." God's plan is beyond our comprehension. Believe in it and you will gain in terms of patience, inner strength and will power.
7. Do Not Bite Off More Than You Can Chew.
This maxim needs to be remembered constantly. We often tend to take more responsibilities than we are capable of carrying out. This is done to satisfy our ego. Know your limitations. Why take on additional loads that may create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind by expanding your external activities. Reduce your material engagements and spend time in prayer, introspection and meditation. This will reduce those thoughts in your mind that make you rest less. Uncluttered mind will produce greater peace of mind.
8. Meditate Regularly.
Meditation calms the mind and gets rid of disturbing thoughts. This is the highest state of peace of mind. Try and experience it yourself. If you meditate earnestly for half an hour everyday, your mind will tend to become peaceful during the remaining twenty-three and half-hours. Your mind will not be easily disturbed as it was before. You would benefit by gradually increasing the period of daily meditation. You may think that this will interfere with your daily work. On the contrary, this will increase your efficiency and you
will be able to produce better results in less time.
9. Never Leave The Mind Vacant.
An empty mind is the devil's workshop. All evil actions start in the vacant mind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something worthwhile. Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your interest. You must decide what you value more: money or peace of mind. Your hobby, like social work or religious work, may not always earn you more money, but you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement. Even when you are resting physically, occupy yourself in healthy reading or mental chanting of God's name.
10. Do not waste time in protracted wondering " Should I or shouldn't I?”
Days, weeks, months, and years may be wasted in that futile mental debating. You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate all future happenings. Always remember, God has His own plan, too for you. Value your time and do the things that need to be done. It does not matter if you fail the first time. You can learn from your mistakes and succeed the next time. Sitting back and worrying will lead to nothing. Learn from your mistakes, but do not brood over the past. DO NOT REGRET. Whatever happened was destined to happen only that way. Take it as the Will of God. You do not have the power to alter the course of God's Will. Why cry over spilt milk?
and this 11th point is my own ;-)
11. Do continue reading moral and fun posts to be happy in life ;)
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Friday, May 7, 2010
Why did God make mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
What ingredients are mothers made of ?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We're related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
What kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.
What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
What's the difference between moms & dads?
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
4. Moms have magic; they make you feel better without medicine.
What does your mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Dye it. You know her hair. I'd dye it, maybe blue.
If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
Friday, April 23, 2010
I said, "You should share responsibilities with due love and
Respect each other. Then absolutely there will be no problems."
He asked, "Can you explain?"
I said, "In my house, I take decisions on bigger issues where as my
wife decides on smaller issues. We do not interfere in each other's
Still not convinced, Friend asked me "Give me some examples"
I said," Smaller issues like, which car we should buy, how much amount
to save, when to visit home town, which Sofa, air conditioner,
refrigerator , monthly expenses, whether to keep a maid or not etc are
decided by my wife. I just agree to it"
He asked, "Then what is your role?"
I said," My decisions are only for very big issues. Like whether
America should attack Iran, whether Britain should lift sanction over
Zimbabwe, whether to widen African economy, whether Sachin Tendulkar
should retire, etc etc and Do you know one thing,
My wife NEVER, EVER objects to any of these"…………!!!!!!
Friday, April 16, 2010
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Father to Tintu Mon: Why can't you think every woman as your mother?
Tintu Mon: I can, but if i do so, what will people think of you?
Bus Conductor: Why are you standing near the door, is your father a watchman?
Tintu Mon: Why are you always asking for “change”, Is your father a Beggar??
Tintu Mon to lover: Yesterday I had been to your house!!! Looks like our marriage will not happen!
Lover : Hey dear ! What happened? You met my dad ???
Tintu Mon: No! In fact, I met your sister!
Tintu Mon: I sleep with dad last night
Teacher corrects him: no..no! I slept with dad last night
Tintu Mon: So you reached my home after I slept????? Very baaad Teacher!!!
Teacher: Name the liquid which changes to solid when heated
Tintu Mon: Dosa
A Professor to Tintu Mon: “what is attention deficit hyperactive disorder?”
Tintu Mon: “JIMBALAKDI BAMBA”
Professor: “i don't understand anything”
Tintu Mon: “same 2 you”
Teacher :What is the name of Gandhiji's son?
Tintu Mon: Dineshan
Tintu Mon : Mahatma Gandhi is the father of ‘di-neshan’
Tintu Mon : how am I born ?
Mom: Oh dear! You reached in a flood!
Tintu Mon: So how are you and dad born! And grandpa and grandma and others?
Mom: Oh dear! Even we all in a flood!
Tintu Mon: Opps! No one in this family is born for proper parents!!! Shame on us!
To be is to do(Socrates)
To do is to be(Plato)
To be or not to be(Shakespeare)
Alright here you go!!! .Scoo be do be dooo(Tintu mon, LKG)
(That is the jingle of a local student’s bag ad)
Teacher: What is “Al2 O3″ ?
Teacher: Tintu, What is ‘Fe2 O3″?
Tintu Mon : “Filomina”
Tintu Mon: ‘Dad Dad! I wanna say something!..
Dad: Never talk while having food youuuuu idi***+_#)_(*)$(&!!!
Dad: Ok now tell me what you want?
Tintu Mon: I was about to tell this……..there was a lizard in your plate!!!!!!
(pic taken from net)*
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Friday, March 19, 2010
'I've got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there's somebody under it. I'm scared. I think I'm going crazy.'
'Just put yourself in my hands for one year,' said the psychiatrist.
'Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears.'
'How much do you charge?'
'Eighty dollars per visit,' replied the doctor.
'I'll sleep on it and if needed I will come back to you,' I said.
Six months later the Psychiatrist met me on the street.
'Why didn't you come to see me about those fears you were having?' he asked.
'Well, Eighty bucks a visit three times a week for a year is an awful lot of money!
A bartender cured me for $10. I was so happy to have saved all that money that I went and bought me a new SUV.
'Is that so!' With a bit of an attitude he said, 'and how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?'
'He told me to cut the legs off the bed - ain't nobody under there now!’
SCREW THOSE PSYCHIATRISTS.. GO HAVE A DRINK & TALK TO YOUR BAR ATTENDER. ;-)
Friday, March 5, 2010
What would you do?....you make the choice. Don't look for a punch line, there isn't one. Read it anyway. My question is: Would you have made the same choice?
This is a mail which i received and thought should share with you all.....:)
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Arriving at the airfield, he spotted a plane warming up outside a hanger. He jumped in with his bag, slammed the door shut, and shouted, 'Let's go'.
The pilot taxied out, swung the plane into the wind and took off. Once in the air, the photographer instructed the pilot, 'Fly over the valley and make low passes so I can take pictures of the fires on thehillsides.'
'Why?' asked the pilot.
'Because I'm a photographer for CNN' , he responded, 'and I need to getsome close up shots.'
The pilot was strangely silent for a moment, finally he stammered, 'So,what you're telling me, is ............. You're NOT my flight instructor?????'
When you ASSUME = you make an ASS out of U and ME ;-)
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Friday, January 29, 2010
One day, one scientist came to his boss and told him - Sir, I have promised to my children that I will take them to the exhibition going on in our township. So I want to leave the office at 5:30 pm. His boss replied "OK, You're permitted to leave the office early today" The Scientist started working. He continued his work after lunch.
As usual he got involved to such an extent that he looked at his watch when he felt he was close to completion. The time was 8.30 PM. suddenly he remembered of the promise he had given to his children. He looked for his boss, He was not there. Having told him in the morning itself, he closed everything and left for home. Deep within himself, he was feeling guilty for having disappointed his children.
He reached home. Children were not there. His wife alone was sitting in the hall and reading magazines. The situation was explosive, any talk would boomerang on him.
His wife asked him "Would you like to have coffee or shall I straight away serve dinner if you are hungry. The man replied "If you would like to have coffee, I too will have but what about the children?"
Wife replied "You don't know. Your manager came here at 5:15 PM and has taken the children to the exhibition "
What had really happened was .... The boss who granted him permission was observing him working seriously at 5.00 PM. He thought to himself, this person will not leave the work, but if he has promised his children they should enjoy the visit to exhibition. So he took the lead in taking them to exhibition.
The boss does not have to do it every time. But once it is done, loyalty is established. That is why all the scientists at Thumba continued to work under their boss even though the stress was tremendous.
By the way, can you guess as to who the boss was..?
Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam (Missile Man & Former President of India)